I’ve been so happy lately that it seems completely surreal. Not only have I been encouraged by people for the first time in my life but I also seem to have found someone who likes me enough to start a relationship with me at long last. This might sound silly to most people but to someone who has never been loved (?) in such a way this is unbelievable and strange and also really incedible.
People have been so kind that it made me feel really pampered and forget my self-hate and depression. I have been able to smile all day, I have been able to take compliments, and I have even seen improvement in the things I do and taking pride in it.
But I’m also scared. How do I deserve such happiness? And if I close my eyes, will it fade?
It’s so strange but somehow I hope it can stay this way and that this time - only this once - I won’t have to pay for it.